Monday, October 17, 2011

The Submissive Pisser

      I moved out shortly after returning home from college. My new place is downtown, but I still visit my parents a few times a week. When my parents decided to visit my sister at college this past weekend, I was in charge of watching over the house and our two dogs. A pretty easy task, especially considering our golden retriever is turning 14 soon and our border collie could entertain itself for hours. Don’t wake one up and put the other one outside. Done.
Watch out...He's got that look in his eye.
     As effortless as this sounds, there’s always an initial suspense when you first walk into our house. See, our border collie has an interesting way of showing affection. As our veterinarian explained to us, we have a “submissive pisser” in the family. For those of you who aren’t familiar with the condition, it means our dog shows his loyalty by spraying pee everywhere. Though he tends to be more enthusiastic with new people, you’re never quite sure if you will need a shower immediately after walking through the door.
       I managed to stay dry as I walked in this weekend, but the fear still makes me laugh. Imagine if people greeted each other that way. See a friend out one day? Say hello and hike a leg. What better way to show you care?
What will really get you laughing is that I had the same personality trait as a baby. Though my problem wasn’t quite as ongoing, my parents told me that I had quite the knack for soaking my grandfather when I was younger. Granted he was supposedly changing my diaper and I aimed for the face, but the parallel is just uncanny, yes?
Here’s to shaking hands and giving hugs…and man’s best friend, despite the occasional bladder control problem.


  1. This post made me laugh! I'm very familiar with this canine issue, unfortunately. My dog, who lives in Brooklyn with my sister now (I really miss her), does the same thing. I tend to forget about her little habit of greeting people that way, so whenever I visit her, or she visits me, I have a mess to clean up. Luckily, she's a female, so it's more of a puddling issue than a spraying one! Still, no fun to clean up. She did manage to mark a few of my friends after jumping on their laps! They definitely weren't pleased, to put it mildly.

  2. C,

    Something about being covered in urine rarely pleases people. I'm sorry to hear you have the same issue! I thought it was just a family problem haha! I highly recommend buying some Resolve. Really does the trick.